How personal development restructure me in life after undesirable event

I am Stella Lincoln, and this is my story of how I developed into a more confident woman. I am graduated from the University of California, Los Angeles. During my graduation, I fell in love with a boy who was my high school mate. Life seems like a fairytale cinematographed by Disney. However, neither fairies exist nor fairytale last for long. I got married to my long time love, and it turns into a nightmare.

The first restriction was on my job. I wasn’t permitted to do a job or continue my education. I was soon blessed with a son, and my life becomes busy. But, the worst events were still to come. My husband started cheating on me, and it reached the physical and mental abuse. I was utterly broken and want to die in misery.

The first light of personal development came into my life when I saw the movie titled ‘The Iron Lady’ it was the life story of Britain Prime Minister Margaret Thatcher. One scene of the movie changed my life. When I saw her fighting from a bundle of men, it reminds me of women's real power. I quit the abusive relationship and decided to re-develop myself.

A divorced woman with a three-year-old son is an easy victim of societal stigma. It was challenging to collect myself and restart my life. I wasn’t working from my graduation, which created a lot of trouble for me; thanks to my writing habit that secured my career. Let’s see how personal development supported me.

I revised my course books and tried to remember some main elements that can support me in getting a job. I came up with a course on personal management that teaches us to draft our goals and act on them.

The first thing that I did was to find the purpose of my life. I sat all day long and can’t find anything that can be the purpose of my life. Then, I made a list of things that I fear losing, and the only thing that I came up with on the list was my son. I found the purpose of my life; it was to raise my child as a gentleman. For this, I was willing to do everything that it takes and demands. 

My goal was set, and I was ready to launch my journey. However, motivation was still missing to continue on the journey.
When I started giving interviews as a writer, I was rejected by ten firms. This was difficult for me, the person who is already broken. Every time I came home, my son used to praise my efforts, and I felt motivated. He was the only source of my motivation. He kept me going. I practiced empathy and meditation. I read articles about African villages and the misery they face. The domestic violence faced by South-Asian women. These elements increased my empathy, and I get motivated that; I still had many things to start my life.
Building empathy and sympathy for other people is efficient in reducing your stress and keeping you motivated.    

After all those rejections, I focused on my weaknesses. The personal development process encouraged me to accept my mistakes and overcome them.

I started working on my mistakes adequately and finally got a job. It was the first day of my job when I was appreciated by my boss, which initiates self-actualisation. I overcome that trench which was in between my confidence and my career. I felt confident while working there and started facing people with more courage. This was the start of my self-actualisation process. With every milestone achieved, my self-image increased, and I started loving myself.

I started shopping with my son and hanging out with my friends. This is what the self-development process does to me. 

The process of personal development is directly related to stress management. There are different aspects in which development cures stress.

The first is the number of activities. The development process demands time.
In my case, there was hardly any spare time left to overthink and create stress. The lack of time supported me in managing the stress as well.

Another aspect is the acceptance of reality. Personal development makes you courageous enough to accept yourself as you are. It arises a feeling of courage and hope for brighter days.

 
If it does not complete today, it will be completed by the next day. I learned to accept my failures and tried not to repeat the same. The stress vanished from my life slowly.

It is a famous saying that leaders are born, not made. But what are the criteria to be a born leader? I believe that every person has a leader inside; the only element missing is unleashing your leadership abilities. Some of us are able to express it and be leaders, and others accept that leash and continue to live.

The first thing that connects personal development and leadership is the discovery of the inner self. The process of personal development initiates self-actualisation and self-recognition. If you won’t recognize yourself and your purpose, then how will you convey it to others?

This is why leadership is entirely dependent upon personal development. The adequate skill set required for being a leader can only be possible through personal development. The aspects on which personal development works are self-actualisation, definite goal setting, stress management, communication and confidence. This is how both phenomena are on the same page.  

It seems complicated to collect all the broken pieces of your heat and start a new life after a heart-wrenching incident. However, it is difficult but not impossible. Personal development is a process that can support you in restarting your life.

The process of learning new skills and eliminating lacking from your life is an adequate step. These steps support you in creating a new life.
I believe my story will be courageous enough for you to restructure your life. You can contact me anytime if you want any help.